Nicole's just better with babies. I've become accustomed to that over the past couple of weeks. I'm just not great at sitting there for hours on end consoling, comforting, feeding, burping, cooing, cuddling, and playing with an infant. These hours are often spent with one or both hands tied up, and I'm all about trying to get things done.
So sometimes, I get extra diaper duty, because Nicole spends more time on the couch (she's a one-handed typist, and can navigate the computer while holding Random. She's basically a miracle mommie).
Oh, and Nicole never just hands me a whizzy baby.
Oh no.
So just the other day, Nicole handed me a particularly stinky baby. Contrary to popular belief, some Daddies can tell a full diaper from a dry one from the feel of it. This was a full diaper.
Even knowing it, even with fair warning, I wasn't prepared what I was getting into.
I opened the diaper to see what apparently was the eponymous bikini. It was as if she was wearing a little lime green bikini made of poo. It was the consistency of ricotta cheese, and the color of key lime pie. It was almost like what you'd find in a cannoli on St. Patty's day.
Funny thing is, I was forewarned at the hospital, "Always wipe baby girls front to back. You don't want to get poo in her privates."
With the bikini, it seemed that she did that well enough herself! Strangely enough, no poo went up the backside. I'm starting to think I'm putting the diapers on backwards.
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